Day 185 – A Lot on My Mind

I hate feeling like a downer, and I hate when my brain gets the best of me. I hate getting stressed and having anxiety over minor stuff, and having major anxiety over bigger things. It can just be brutal to my day, and kind of shuts me down. I hate it because I try to not let it happen, but certain things just do it to me.

I don’t know if it’s the reality of coming to work after 5 days off and being grumpy or what, but I’ve just felt more unhappy the last day or so and it sucks. I feel like there is so much on my plate, and like I’m drowning. Maybe it’s just an overreaction and I’ll feel better as the night goes on, but driving in to work I just felt so bummed out.

I don’t know if it’s any major things that lock on to my brain or just a build up of a lot of smaller things (probably the latter) but once those puppies build up I just want to lose it. All of my motivation, or excitement for things just completely disappears and I probably come off as a total douchasaurus and my patience is just minimal. I just find I have a lot on my mind and the list of stresses seems to grow and grow.

Sorry for the lame blog, but I wanted to get it knocked out early and very vaguely vent a bit. I don’t like going in to major details as to what’s bugging me, but just saying FML is all I need.

Of course, using that FML terms always makes me feel even more like crap because people have it way worse than I, and I feel like I turn in to a little baby. Anyway, I hope everyone had a great 4th.


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